A flower does not think of competing with the flower next to it. It just blooms.
Zen Shin
Remember scrolling through social media and stumbling on a picture of an old friend, grinning from ear to ear, with a brand-new sports car in the background?
Or perhaps you’ve seen a former classmate’s vacation photos from an exotic destination, looking like they’ve jumped straight out of a travel magazine.
It’s human nature to feel pangs of envy when faced with the seemingly successful lives of friends, acquaintances, and strangers. But the truth is, comparing ourselves to others can be a self-destructive habit that keeps us from recognizing our unique strengths.
How can we break free from this habit? Here are some steps you can take to stop the comparisons and embracing a healthier mindset.
1. Recognize the Unhealthy Effects of Comparison
It’s easy to get ensnared by the habit of comparing yourself with those around you, particularly in this day and age where online media allows us to be continually updated on other people’s lives.
Comparing ourselves with those whose lives appear to be better than ours can result in feelings of inferiority and diminished self-worth.
It’s important that we recognize the unhealthy effects of comparison so that we can take steps towards building a healthier mindset.
Comparing ourselves to others can stifle our own progress, thus preventing us from reaching our full potential. This may cause us to feel stuck, which in turn leads us to negatively compare ourselves to others even more, keeping us in an endless cycle of dissatisfaction and unhappiness.
2. Acknowledge Your Unique Strengths
How can you do this?
First, identify what makes you special. What are your natural abilities? Maybe you’re a talented artist or an excellent listener. Perhaps you have a knack for problem solving or public speaking. Or maybe you’re good with numbers or have an eye for fashion trends.
Contemplate how these strengths have helped you in the past assist you going forward.
Once you know what sets you apart from other people, use this knowledge as motivation to keep going when times get tough or when obstacles come up in life. Be mindful that no one else can do what only you are capable of. Internalize this truth, and you’ll become more confident in yourself.
Another great way to acknowledge your unique strengths is by recognizing the areas where other people need help but which come easily for you—and then offering them assistance if possible.
This kind of generosity goes a long way toward building relationships with others while also reinforcing your own confidence levels because it shows just how valuable your individual strengths really are.
How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others Video
3. Focus on Your Own Progress
Celebrate the successes you’ve had so far, no matter how small they may seem. Acknowledge yourself for taking steps towards your goals and objectives.
Concentrate on bettering yourself daily instead of measuring up to those around you – this will assist in maintaining focus when it comes to personal growth and achievement.
When faced with a challenge, remind yourself of why it’s worth striving for despite any setbacks or difficulties along the way. Track your progress over the course of time to demonstrate how much you’ve achieved since beginning. This will give motivation when times get tough or if feelings of discouragement arise from seeing someone else succeed before you do.
4. Celebrate Others’ Successes
It’s natural to feel a twinge of envy when someone you know succeeds in life. Comparing our progress to that of others can cause us to feel worse about ourselves.
However, learning how to appreciate the successes of those around us is key for realizing true contentment. When we focus on celebrating the successes of those around us instead of comparing ourselves, we can find true joy in life without succumbing to unhealthy comparison habits.
Create Lasting Inner Peace
You can learn to stop comparing by taking time to focus on your own journey and accomplishments, rather than comparing yourself to others.
Don’t let others stop you from flowering into the person you’re meant to be. Instead of competing with others, complement them with your own beauty.
This will allow you to grow in ways unique to you and create lasting inner peace.
Hello, Cylon.
Very good, wise and kind advice. Thank you.
I guess we are herd animals and can panic when somebody appears to race ahead of us.
What I should try to do is actually learn from those who appear to be ‘doing better’ than me, and thank them, instead of quietly fuming with envy/resentment, etc. lol.
Life is ups and downs, stops and starts so our petty judgments are pretty pointless most of the time. Thanks for the reminder.
That’s something I’ve been trying to do as well. In many ways, thanking people I would normally be envious of has improved my life. Thanks for sharing!