“I am not a saint, unless you think of a saint as a sinner who keeps on trying.” ~ Nelson Mandela
Let me guess.
You sleep with your smartphone because it’s your alarm clock.
You love all the different alarm sounds and ease of use.
You may even have a base that it plugs into to turn it into a real radio.
I’ve slept with my smartphone for years but have always been uneasy with the relationship. One day, it dawned on me that my phone was by my side 24/7. I’d developed such an attachment to my phone that I didn’t think I could survive without it. My relationship with my phone became the most important one in my life – more than my relationships with my spouse, my children, or with God.
With my phone, I felt overstimulated, without it I felt restless and bored. Something was amiss.
And it’s not just me.
An addicted culture
As human beings, we are prone to addictions of all kinds. And there is a growing recognition that our addiction to technology has skyrocketed – even as it provides us with remarkable benefits. It is this very technology that allows me to communicate with you through my blog.
But the problem is not with the technology, it’s about us and how we use it. Because truth is, in my bedroom, my smartphone is way more than an alarm clock. I’ve used to read, text, email, web surf, buy stuff, and watch movies – all from the comfort of my bed. And when it was time to fall asleep, I would struggle to quiet my mind and sometimes stayed awake for hours. The next day, I’d wake up feeling tired and cranky.
Dumb idea to use my smartphone as an alarm? I think so. Now I just use a regular alarm clock.
A word on sin
The word “sin” is has but disappeared from our everyday usage. Associated primarily with human depravity, we have pushed the idea of sin off to the margins. But drawing on St. Augustine, David Brooks reminds us that sin is nothing more than having our loves out of order.
I realized I was sinning by putting my relationship with my technology above my more important relationships – symbolized by my willingness to sleep with it.
And this realization is not just held by people in my generation and older. Millennials, born into this world of technology are realizing more and more that they need to create safe distances from their technology. They may not use the language of sin to express how they feel, but they know something is fundamentally disordered.
In my work as a college chaplain, I’ve spoken to college students who tell me that they take regular breaks from their technology to reconnect with what’s truly important. They are instinctively attempting to reorder their loves. Some disconnect from social media for extended periods. Others leave their phones behind intentionally so that they can once again become familiar with the faces of the people they love and care about the most.
This simultaneously gave me hope and shamed me because I was not being nearly as intentional with my technology.
Why I decided to stop sleeping with my smartphone
Yes, I decided to stop sleeping with my smartphone for all the typical reasons: improving my sleep, curbing my urge to text or surf the web, reducing my exposure to cell phone radiation, reducing my stress caused by alerts and notifications, and giving more attention to my spouse. My decision also diminished my temptation to make impulse purchases when I’m most vulnerable.
Removing my phone from my sacred sleep space has benefited me in all these ways. But it’s also allowed me to reorder my loves.
For this, I am most grateful.
All good points. i just got a smart phone a few months ago and I love it. I’m being careful not to let that love be out of order because I have seen too many of my close friends become addicted. However I am training myself to have it on me or nearby at all times so that it serves as an emergency tool (like the tv commercial for those medical alert buttons: “Help, I’m alone and I’ve fallen!”) It’s on the bedside table at night, but it is turned completely off.
I think it’s great that you have learned from the poor habits of others. If your phone serves an emergency tool, it makes sense to have it close to you at all times – as long as you can manage the temptation to surf all day 🙂 Thanks so much for sharing!
Hello Cylon,
Not only am I poor, but maybe I have an ego that encourages me to go against the grain – I do not have, nor do I want to have, a mobile phone of any sort. I also have friends who natter all of the time and I doubt I would be able to get away from their calls to me. But, my biggest turn off is seeing young mothers focusing on their phones in preference to tending to their children. This happens as they walk along and when they travel on public transport. l assume it happens at home as well. This is heart-breaking. It tells us a great deal about our society and our loss of real, core values. We also have laws in the UK that prohibit hand held phones while driving – it doesn’t seem to make much difference. All in all, most of us are indeed addicted – very sad so thank you for bringing up this topic. Good luck!
Thank you for sharing this – yes, it is indeed sad that we are giving more attention to our technology than to our children. Again, it gives me hope that our young adults are waking up to this reality – maybe because some of them were raised by absentee parents and were not given the attention they needed. It is my sincere hope that we all learn to put our technology in its proper place. And good for you for going against the grain on this one!